* TELL ME I'M A WRECK (OPEN) --

[EVAN REESE TORRES]

WHEN YOU TELL ME I'M A WRECK YOU SAY ,
THAT I'M A MESS; HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ANYTHING LESS?

The auditorium sometimes reminded Evan of home.

New York was home. Her mother’s warm smile, understanding eyes, and loving personality were home. Her father’s knowledge, stories, and life experiences were home. Her little brother’s acceptance, his way of figuring her out, and the way he could always keep her secrets were home. The only place outside of her family’s apartment that Evan considered home was her school’s auditorium. Well, her high school. Now, she was too old for high school; she’d graduated months before being sent to the camp. Either way, the auditorium had been her home away from home since she was fifteen back in New York. Evan always spent her lunch and study hall hours there, making up fake scenarios with an audience, a band behind her, and a microphone stand in front. She was a singer; it’s what she did. She pretended for four years to carry a mic back and forth across the stage in the auditorium, pounding her feet against the hard wood. She would sing Blink 182 covers, Green Day, and so many others. It was her home, her own little place she could escape to when she couldn’t tell even her best friend that she was able to change her body into a different shape, a different being.

The auditorium at Camp Brook reminded her of home. On the first day she was at the camp, after she’d unpacked, met her cabin mates and was given a full run-through of the rules, she asked where the auditorium was. When she found it via directions from the counselor that had shown her around until then, a huge fucking smile spread across her face. The stage resembled the one she’d walked on back in New York, and she instantly felt at ease. She was home, or as much as at home as she was going to get at Camp Brook. Her cabin wouldn’t ever compare to the effect that the auditorium had on her; the inner performer in Evan wanted to jump out of her chest and be a completely different person just so she could see herself truly being happy for the first time since graduation. She hadn’t been on a stage since then, and so as soon as she saw the auditorium at Brook, she ran to the stage, grabbed her imaginary mic and screamed, “HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU, CAMP BROOK?!” at the top of her lungs. Of course, someone had heard her or something and came right in, asking what she was doing with a look that made Evan feel like she was crazy. She just gave them a sour face, hopped off the stage and marched back to her cabin.

She’d been doing that for…a couple of months now. Every time she would start to sing, someone would come in and ruin her fun. It didn’t matter if it were a camp leader, a counselor, or even just another camper; she would always leave just as fast as they came in to the room. She’d either shift into a bird and fly out, or she’d just plain walk out and hope whoever was in there’s feelings. She didn’t spare many people, especially not when they walked in on her being home in a place that was so beyond farther from home than she’d ever been. When she was mad, you knew it; Evan Reese was famous for her temper around Camp Brook, and after a while of getting mad enough to nearly steam on the way out of the auditorium, people started catching on to the idea that maybe interrupting her wasn’t a good idea. Some people were smart enough to wait until Evan was done singing to walk into the room, clap, and pay per compliments on her singing. Other’s were still a bit stupid, but for a good part of her mind, Evan just left the room when those people walked in.

Finally, she found a good day though. It was a good day from the start; Evan woke up and her hair was in perfect order, her jeans had been washed correctly, and her favorite bunk mate left out some feathers for her to pick out of to put in her hair. She’d gotten dressed, knowing she didn’t have much to do today, and let her mind instantly find the one place she would be at ease, so long as no one interrupted her. The auditorium. Evan’s feet moved faster than her mind as she power walked across the campgrounds, moving without thinking. She found it easily, and once she was on the stage Evan Torres felt more like Joan Jett. She found that imaginary microphone again, pulled it to her stomach, took in a deep breath like she was performing for the first time in front of a full auditorium instead of an empty one filled with imaginary people, than pulled the mic up and began to sing. She felt at home even more with her lips moving, her body pushing out sound waves that could reach the back of the room even without amplifiers, guitars, and sound boards.

Like her personality, Evan’s voice was strong.

She went through one verse, than the next, finally making it to the end of the song before smiling and thanking the people that were only in her head. She took one look at each entrance to the room, let her hands loosen up (which would have caused her mic to drop if it were real), bit her lip, and sat on the edge of the stage. All of it reminded her of being back in New York, before all of the riots and chaos surrounding supernatural beings such as herself. If things would just be at peace between beings like Evan and normal humans like the rest of her family, she’d be at NYU right now, instead of at some camp that kept her safe from the things she felt with every fiber of her being that she was ready to fight for and against. Evan was nineteen, and she had all the faith in the world in herself to be able to handle herself and her shifting out in the real world. So why didn’t she leave?

It was her father. It was the image of Sergio Torres’s face, laden with disappointment, that kept Evan from leaving. She didn’t want to see her father like that, or hurt if she got hurt or thrown in jail and executed. She didn’t want her father, who’d fought so hard and lost his whole family at the age of sixteen when he wanted a better life than a native American life for his family, to be disappointed or hurt over her. Evan did as he said because she wanted him to be happy, she wanted him to be content with her life and his. Of course, she believed in absolute freedom and never living up to someone else’s standards, but…this was her father. He had sacrificed so much to have her in his life, and she wanted to keep it that way. Still, the thought of home made her sad, and being in a place that reminded her of home really scared her out of her mind. How could she be so happy in a place that made her so sad? How could singing in that place make her mindless when her thoughts never ceased to lead back to her mother, her brother, and her father? “This is stupid,” she muttered, pulling up her knees to wrap her arms around them. This wasn’t Evan; Evan was strong and happy and hyper. This was….a homesick girl that was too troubled to help herself. But she wouldn’t cry, no matter how much she missed home. She wouldn’t cry.

Evan put her forehead to her knees and sighed, keeping her tears at bay. Hopefully.

1,310 - open for now - my first posts are always longer than i expect them to be. :/ banner made by " miscounted stars , @ caution

[MORGAN MAY BYRD]

we're sick like animals

we play pretend

Kalak, funniest thing you ever did see. Some people called them maned wolves, but they're really kalaks, like hyenas, but better because they don't laugh. That way the joke really is on you. They're as cunning as a fox, and twice as pretty, twice as tall. Thin as toothpicks, with pillar like legs that send them into the sky. On second thought, they can't be real, can they? They were. May-bird knew too well how real their thin physique was and how it felt to be crammed inside it. Okay, that wasn't doing her russet-haired body justice, it wasn't a curse or a cram, it was better than her real body, and she would much rather just shift all the time. It was easier being in the thing skeleton that walking around in her own. But, honest, May hated girls that were obsessed with the way they looked. She hated the bulimics and the bingers, and the anorexics. But she couldn't find herself hating anyone when she decided to skip breakfast. She knew a lot about all sorts of bodies, and she knew what was healthy and what wasn't. This wasn't healthy, but she couldn't stop herself. It was like trying to shove a square peg in a round hole, the way she looked at herself. And even though you knew it never did work, it won't work, never will work, the ignorant kid just keeps trying. And May couldn't stop herself from trying, though she was far from ignorant.

It's just, what skills did she have? She could shift into the vulture of canines, and she could handle any sort of gore with a smile on her face, but that didn't seem to be any of the qualities people were looking for. So pretty, that's what was left. And May-bird was pretty enough. But, not pretty enough, apparently. And there was nothing that she could outright change but her weight. It was something she did subtly, no one seemed to notice, unless you knew her pretty well. But not many people could stake a claim at that.

The entire arguement was null when it came to her shifting; she wanted to spend every waking moment in her kalak body. It was easier, it was sleekier, she was happier. No one looked at a maned wolf and made asumptions. It was just there, the end. No one had to worry about the thing, except wondering if it would steal your lunch. And, rest assured, this one wouldn't.

And so this particular kalak wandered around the camp relatively unbothered. As a person, she was kept around for her medical skills; not many other people could boast all the knowledge that she had with all the different species the camp had. And she had an attitude were she was not biased towards all the clashes of light and dark and blood and lust. She was a shifter, and they tended to mind their own business. And even then, she didn't mind the shifter business; she let her good friend Evan deal with that. No, she really didn't have a stake claimed in any of the business. So, she was pretty much left alone. She was staff, so she had free rein of the premises. And she was properly in control of her powers, so she could leave any time she wanted to (but the chaos outside just wasn't really her thing). She was basically an after thought here; just that little dangling participle that no one really can remember what it's there for, but knows that if it leaves the entire sentence will fall apart.

Yes, May-bird was just a forgotten form of speech.

On this day, the kalak wandered outside with it's nose down to the ground, sniffling and snuffling for a forgotten snack. A rotted mole lay on the ground, crooked legs and nose pointed to the sky. May sat, lone lupine haunches overlapping the rest of her body as she stared down at it. Not appetizing. But she was a carrion kid, and this was what she was supposed to like. But no, not today. She wrinkled her nose, and sniffled and snuffled some more, until she heard huge bellows of noise. Like a cartoon character, her head popped up out of the bushes, watching the outside of the auditorium, big dish-like ears perking at the familiar sound. Evan. She dashed toward the building, shifting mid leap back into the black-haired may, and she walked quietly to the building. Jewlery twinkled around her neck, tangled from the run that it had spent festering in her gnarled fur. Funny, that was the only thing that ever really stayed when she shifted; all the trinkets her father had given her. But that was besides the point.

She walked into the auditorium, just in time to hear Evan mutter this is stupid. She sounded on the verge of tears. That broke May's heart. She did have a mothering instinct, all canines tended too, that big ol' hearted need to heal, to protect. It's what maid her a good nurse, the need to patch things together and made sure they worked to everyone's expectations. She sprinted through the chairs, wordlessly doing what she expected was right and cradling part of Evan too her chest. It was kind of hard to do, they were the same size, and the stage made it so where they were totally even even though Evan was sitting. ' Nothing is stupid. Maybe you're looking for a different word. ' She stepped back, and put a finger under the younger girl's chin, bring her eye level to her. She frowned. ' Unneeded. As in, these tears are unneeded, kid. ' She smiled wryly, hoping that sweet little phrase made the other girl a little happier.


WEWT. done. and kind of long. YAY!

[EVAN REESE TORRES]

WHEN YOU TELL ME I'M A WRECK YOU SAY ,
THAT I'M A MESS; HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ANYTHING LESS?

She thought she’d been alone. In fact, Evan had been positive she’d been alone. She must have been loud enough for someone to hear. She probably was, considering that when Evan was singing and in the moment, she didn’t really care about people watching. Interrupting and watching were two different things, mind you. Evan preferred watching, because she never really got nervous, nor did she really ever get mad when people watched her sing or perform. At least this person waited until she was done, waited until she was at her low for the day before entering the room, her space, and bringing her into their arms. Secretly, meaning only to Evan herself, she kind of wished it was Homer. Grayson. Whatever he wanted to be called. He was her best friend pretty much, even if she had many of those around the camp these day, and she kind of counted on him more than anyone else around Camp Brook. He understood her better than anyone else, and quite frankly she loved every bit of him for it. But she never told anyone; not even Grayson himself.

But that didn’t smell like Grayson. That didn’t sound like Grayson, either. Sure as hell didn’t feel like Grayson. He was so much taller than Evan, and quite stronger at the right time of the month (Evan giggled every time she thought that). This was someone much smaller, someone more her size. This was someone she knew too. This person talking to her, holding her like her mother used to was someone Evan recognized by the sound of her voice, the smell of her…freshly shifted flesh. Evan had shifted with this person before, she could tell. Even if she didn’t shift in to the same animal that this person did, she knew the scent well. “May-bird,” she said, sighing before letting her arms wrap around the nurse. The fellow shifter was a comfort to Evan; she was like her mother, only more fun and more her age at the camp, which made her happy enough to be content when she wasn’t. Like now, when she was down, at a low that Evan didn’t like to be in. For now, she’d take what she was given, and that much was a matronly friend.

She looked up at her friend and sighed again. Evan hated sighing sometimes, but this time wasn’t one of those times. She had a tendency to be a bit dramatic in some of the things she did, sighing being just an affect of that. She wasn’t seriously trying to make her sadness more dramatic (it was already dramatic as is), she just wanted to let her friend know exactly how she was feeling about this, as if it wasn’t already obvious. She really should have been an actress; she had everything going for her in that direction. She was dramatic, didn’t care what people thought about her, did things her own way, and lived in New York after all; but instead Evan had been sent to Camp Brook. Which wasn’t so bad, when she had a friend like May-bird. At least then, someone like Evan could hope to get out of the camp one day, to have peace between people like her (supernaturals) and people like her parents (normal human beings). At least with a friend like May-bird, Evan knew she wasn’t exactly alone.

That could be because they were both shifters. Sure, every shifter pretty much had the right to change into a different animal from any other species or shifter, but at least the shifters also had the right (in this camp) to come together and be a collective group instead of individual shifters and their individual shifter forms. For instance, Evan became a vulture after a few mishaps at first with her form changing without her permission into animals that she never really even thought about, while she knew that May-bird was contrary to her name and became some kind of….Spanish wolf (she never could remember the name of the wolf). So really, what reason did she have to be sad? Sure, her family was thousands of miles away in New York, but she had a new family here at camp brook. Evan had Grayson, May-Bird, Ash…..she had enough.

It took someone like May-bird for her to see that. “Unnecessary. Tears are unnecessary. Yeah, you’re probably right May-bird.” Evan pulled back just a little to sit up right again, smiling at her friend before she pulled her arms away. She sighed again and pulled her hands onto her lap, lacing her fingers together while looking down at her legs. It was all so dramatic, but she really didn’t think twice about it. Evan didn’t do that. So she smiled at May-bird and patted a spot next to her, inviting her friend to take the seat next to her. “The auditorium just reminded me of New York. Got a little homesick there. No worries,” she said, assuring May that there wasn’t anything to worry about. Evan could handle herself, but she would never take a friend like May-bird for granted.

851 - may-bird/SEREN<3 - so that was kinda short. but not really. :) banner made by " miscounted stars , @ caution

[MORGAN MAY BYRD]

sorry you, sorry me, sorry every inbetween

everybody here will never be somebody clean

Most of the shifters here at camp took advantage of the fact that they could now shift into other creatures. They took advantage of the sense of community that Camp Brook brought, the leaders and co leaders, and the listeners and the conslers. May? Naw, but thank you kindly, she'd just rather pass. Her carrion Kalak form was fine with her, it fit her personalty and it made her happy. Sure, she'd like to see what it would be like to be a vulture, to fly, like Evan, but she didn't have some dying need to understand what it was like. She was always, essentially, a loner. But she mad exceptions for the best of people, and that's what this all was, an exception. Well, it started as an exception, but she easily got used to Evan, she loved her company, and she got along well with the younger girl, and she loved trolling the grounds with the girl. It was nice for company, and someone to watch scary movies with. It easily calmed her down and gave her something to do in her spare time. And, surprisingly, Evan passed her rigorous test of friendship by not being particularly obnoxious in any fashion, really. It was surprising to May. Even she was slightly obnoxious, with her huge, sarcastic mouth and rolled eyes.

May had a particular country streak. It came from being the daddy's girl down in 'Bama, and, paired with a John Deere hat, she could easily bring that down-home charm down, without even meaning to. And here it came again. But before it really had a chance to strike through, she felt like she should hand Evan some of her nursy-good-sense, the kind of little tidbits of info that junior high nurses would feed you when you sat in those sharp plastic chairs with your banged up knee from falling while running track. ' There's no reason to be homesick, Evan. You could always go home. But the thing keeping you here is that you know it wouldn't be good. ' She frowned slightly. ' Not just your ego, kid. Everything else. ' She pulled herself up on the stage, and rubbed the small of Evan's back, small little comforting gestures that she hoped the girl appreciated. Sweet moments like this rarely struck May. ' And I don't want you getting hurt. ' She smiled wryly, deciding then that the profound moment was over. ' Besides, I'm almost always right. ' She leaned back a little, silently laughing at her own joke, to see if she could make it funnier than it really was. ' It's kind of a curse. ' She smiled again. May-bird had a good smile, when it was a good hearted one instead of a smirk. It reached her pretty blue eyes. Maybe that's why her dad called her May-bird when she was little (it inevitably grew into her nick-name today) instead of morgan; she had big blue eyes, and, personally, blue always reminded May of just that; May. And then a blue bird, with it's flamboyant beryle feathers.

She was still smiling, when another thought hit. She reached into the pocket of one of those long-vest things that she was famous for, and pulled out a bag of Nestle Peanut-Butter chips. It was crinkly with newness. ' My personal cure for everything. ' She ripped it open and shot a handful in her mouth before offering some to Evan. ' I've talked to every trucker in my day - you know, actually, you'd be surprised how many are shifters and werewolves themselves... guess most people don't really pay attention to truckers - BUT ANYWAY, sorry, i got distracted, but they all said there was one thing that could cure everything from a broken leg to a broken heart; peanut butter. ' Yeah, that was one more thing, when she was with her good friends, she could be a little talkative. She laughed a little, stopping to take a moment to finish eating her mouthful before continuing. ' And here it is, in chip form. Because we all know that's better, m'dear. '



i did not know may was that talkative. x)
don't ask how she had those on her when she shifted.
chalk it up to the magical world of peter pan ;D

[EVAN REESE TORRES]

WHEN YOU TELL ME I'M A WRECK YOU SAY ,
THAT I'M A MESS; HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ANYTHING LESS?

Of course May-bird was right. Like she’d said, she always was. Evan was kind of reckless and didn’t think on her actions too many times, but there Morgan was, telling her exactly what would happen if her imagination really got to her enough to make her leave. Then again, that wasn’t the only reason she wasn’t leaving Camp Brook. So really, May was only half right. The other half of Evan’s reasons not to leave were divided into different parts: Grayson and May, Ash and Cindy, Benji…all of her real friends that understood Evan were at the camp; Her father sent her to Brook to be safe, and she loved him way too much to disrespect his wishes for her and leave like that; Where the fuck would Evan Torres go outside of Camp Brook? Practically three out of every ten humans outside of the camp hated supernatural beings like Evan, even though she was pretty much harmless to any living creature. She turned into a vulture; it wasn’t like she had to wear sunglasses because her eyes shot out lasers if she took them off. She turned into a vulture, the most damage she could do was scratch someone with her claws. But humanity as a whole liked to keep everyone in groups; so if one supernatural was bad, they all were.

Evan sat up a bit when she smelled peanut butter. It was a good thing she wasn’t allergic to peanuts; she used to eat peanut butter like it was going out of style when she went to normal, human summer camps. Eventually, she’d gotten tired of the taste and smell, but after not having eaten it in so long, Evan once again loved everything about the stuff. She listened to May-bird and smiled, taking what she wanted of the little chips, almost shoving them into her mouth. She giggled at her friend’s tendency to get carried away, but nodded nonetheless. It was definitely times like that that made Evan love being at camp, no matter how she felt just moments before. That was the kind of thing that really kept her at the camp; out in the real world, the world she’d lived in for just over eighteen years of her life was a horrible world that she would never be able to survive in these days. Of course, Evan was a strong person full of personality and inhibitions, but the world where her parents and younger brother lived in was the world she was scared shitless of because it no longer held friends like Grayson or May-bird, Ashy or Cindy, or Benji in it. Everyone in Evan’s life, besides her own little brother and her parents, would be against her if she left.

“Those truckers were right.” Evan enjoyed the peanut butter until her mouth was dry and she needed something to drink. She’d get it later, because it wasn’t nearly as important as these moments with May-bird were to her. She licked the roof of her mouth to try and make up for the absence of water or any refreshment, but smiled nonetheless. It was like her troubles from thinking about home were gone, at least pretty much, which just led Evan to believing that peanut butter really did cure everything. Suddenly, she wanted a whole jar to share with her friend, but really she was too lazy, too comfy to go get one from the cafeteria, or where it was called where people around here ate. “It’s fixing just about everything.” Just about was a keyword; there would always be that little voice in the back of Evan’s head, constantly wondering what life for her would be like back with her parents and brother. For the moment though, she was content with what she had.

Only, there was yet another part of her that wanted to tell May-bird something she really hadn’t told anyone else. She hadn’t even written this secret in her journal, just incase someone (maybe Cindy, because that kittygirl was always a curious one) found it and read what she wrote. Evangeline Reese kept this one secret to herself; it was so colossal for even Evan herself that she hardly even let herself think it. This was one subject that maybe peanut butter wouldn’t cure. Possibly some sensible talking to, but that wasn’t something that Evan ever really took into consideration. She wasn’t the kind of person that fell for their best friend, was she? No; Evan had flings. She wasn’t exactly a slut, but she didn’t really care too much whose bed she ended up in. She was bisexual on top of that, so sometimes her bed buddies were that of the female gender. Evan Torres was the wild girl that liked to make out and get crazy; she was definitely the farthest thing from the kind of person that stuck to one person and wanted to settle down.

But she couldn’t help it. Grayson was one of the most amazing people Evan had met (besides May-bird, quite obviously). Evan couldn’t look at Grayson without thinking about how much she enjoyed his company, how much she loved looking at him and knowing he understood her better than most others. She’d kept her feelings for him a secret from him so much that it was almost like Evan was lying to herself. She did so because there was absolutely no way he could feel the same way about her. Grayson knew the kind of girl Evan was, and there was absolutely no way he could love her the way she did. There was no possible way he had to hold himself back the way she did when he was around so that Evan wouldn’t end up kissing him. There was no way he could love her; he was an amazing being and she was positive he was heaven-sent. But Evan screwed around (literally) and was wild and uncontrollable-which was the reason she needed to tell someone. If she couldn’t tell Grayson about her feelings, she could trust May-bird with them, right? May was her friend after all, and there was no reason for Evan to think otherwise.

“May-bird, I have something to tell you, but you have to promise you won’t ever tell another soul. Especially not Grayson.”

1,047 - may-bird/SEREN<3 -CRAZY. <3 banner made by " miscounted stars , @ caution

[MORGAN MAY BYRD]

sorry you, sorry me, sorry every inbetween

everybody here will never be somebody clean

May frowned at the "just about" that Evan implied. Oh no, her peanut butter cured everything. And if it couldn't, Morgan sure as hell would, when it came to either Evan or Grayson. Everyone else could really just go fuck off. I mean, being a nurse, she'd be great and would help you with whatever physical aliment you had. But, once you started to get to the psychological shit, go talk to a fucking counselor. She was not fond of personal problems, especially her own, and that's why she had none. The end, that's the end of that situation. She had no drama in her life, because she did not make room for it. She didn't have bickering friends, unless Evan and Grayson ever got into an arguement, which she doubted would ever happen. She wasn't a whore, she wasn't after any guys. Like said before, she was an after thought to everyone. And, in her opinon, if she was just an after thought to you, than you could kindly get the hell out of her life. That's the only way it worked. ' Just about? I'm pretty sure you just insulted me, babe. ' But from the smile and soft laugh that followed, it was obvious she was joking. She wanted to prod further, but Evan's life wasn't her own. She did, although, have a tiny bit of a habit to live vivaciously thorugh her friend; Evan was popular. Everyone was Evan's friend. And, secretly, May was a little bit happy that Evan spent most of her time with her, instead of with her huge army of other friends, because May was like that, and an even smaller part of her hoped that she made everyone else jealous. But she wouldn't dare admit it, even under threats of death. She didn't admit things easily, she was basically like a vault for secrets, though she'd rather not hear them. I mean, honestly, she'd never tell a word to anyone. But that didn't stop her from going crazy with the possibility that she just might slip.

And, as if Evan was reading her thoughts, voila, here came a secret. And Morgan very, very much wanted to know. What, it's not like it was everyday you got to hear something you didn't know about your best friend! You really couldn't blame the girl for leaning forward ever so slightly, her hands braced against the foot of the stage, so she could get a better look at Ev's face. But what her body may have given away, her face sure as hell didn't. She still had a lazy smile on her face, the kind that came from the contentment that being with someone you truly loved brought about, and her eyes were still portraying that same lazy expression that they always did, like life just didn't give May the challenge she believed she deserved. She laughed again, in that quiet, subtle way she had. May could never be described as an obnoxious, or loud, or dramatic, or flamboyant person, (maybe that's why she and Evan got along so well; she was the water to the younger girl's fire) and even when she got on her long tangents of speech, it was still low and comfortable, like a soft hum in the background, like that one song that you can fall asleep too. Everything about the girl just relaxed you. Unless of course, she didn't like you. Then it was a very different story. But May-bird loved Evan, so it was a moot point.

' You flatter me. Who on earth could I tell? ' It wasn't like it was a secret that May wasn't too sociable. But it didn't bother her. ' But you have my solemn promise. As a Kalak. ' Now this was something; another not-so-little-known secret about May; she did not joke about her shifting. Her maned wolf form was something as religious for her as god to a Catholic. So, that was as solemn a promise that you could get, and she really hoped Evan understood that. May would never cross her, because she might as well just cross herself. The nurse did not really care about a lot of things, but Evan was one of the few things that she cared very much for, and she would never want to hurt her, or push her away.

[EVAN REESE TORRES]

WHEN YOU TELL ME I'M A WRECK YOU SAY ,
THAT I'M A MESS; HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ANYTHING LESS?

In all of her eighteen years in New York, Evan could never remember having a friend as close to her as May-bird was. There was never really another female, besides her own mother, that Evan could trust like a sister, never a girl that wouldn’t blurt out Evan’s secrets to the next girl that would come along. There was never a girl she could tell a secret so huge (for Evan’s secrets) to like she could May-bird, which was what pushed her to go ahead and pour her little heart out. She knew when she went and promised on her wolf-self that she’d keep her mouth shut and Evan’s secret safely tucked inside some compartment of her mind. There really hadn’t ever been someone like that back in New York; maybe there never would be for Evan. That would be another reason to never leave Camp Brook. If May-bird stayed, it was likely Evan would too because she wasn’t sure that a friend like May came along again into her life. She was almost positive it wouldn’t happen. She was almost positive that she would never be able to share this kind of secret over peanut butter chips with anyone else; not even her little brother or her mom.

She watched as May leaned over, but she kept her face and expression lazy and pretty much the same. Yet another thing Evan appreciated about May; things could get serious and she didn’t even have to try to make it light and easy-go-lucky. Or happy-go-lucky, whatever the expression was. That didn’t matter to Evan; the fact that May was willing to listen and more than willing to keep what she heard to herself was really what made Evan want to scream it out instead of simply just state it. But she restrained and mentally shrugged, trying to keep calm (which was a challenge for the usually hyper girl) through all of the things running through her head. Maybe then she could collect herself and try to tell May what she wanted to, what she told her she was going to tell her. But where did she start? Evan tried to think of the first time she saw Grayson, as if that would be a good place to begin the story and the secret, but she could hardly remember that day. All she knew was that it had changed her life, even if she wasn’t sure if it was for the better or worse. Grayson was good for her, but was Evan good for Grayson? She couldn’t even think straight enough to answer that, what made her think she was ready to really tell anyone this secret?

The fact that she’d already set up the situation for herself. She’d already told May-bird that she had to tell her something, and May already promised she’d keep it a secret. There was no backing out- she just had to take a breather and get her mind back on track. Where was she going with this? Evan took a deep breath, looked around quickly, bit the inside of her mouth out of a nervous habit (she hardly got nervous, but a secret like this made her break out of her usual hyper persona apparently), before looking back at Morgan and sighing (again). Finally, her thoughts had ceased and she was able to find her point again. Grayson. She had a crush on him. Okay, she loved him. And she didn’t love anyone that way. She was scared, and May-bird always had an answer to every issue, problem, boo-boo, injury, or puzzle. “So…you know how me and Grayson….Grayson and I are so close, right?” Of course she did; everyone knew that Evan and Grayson were practically attached at the hip that May-bird wasn’t attached to. That was as obvious to the eye as clouds in the sky were to birds (that was only funny because Evan was technically part vulture these days).

Evan took a moment’s pause, not for dramatic affect but to make sure she wouldn’t loose track and start wondering off again. “Well, I thought this was only kind of…possible in books and stories and shit because I’m totally not the type of person to go falling for someone that’s supposed to be her best friend and now my whole mind is mixed up every time I see Grayson because I never know what to do around him! I mean, do I kiss him or do I just hug him when he leaves for the night? Do I ask him to stay or do I go find someone else to spend the night with?!” Well, at least she got it out now. May-bird knew, in one way or another, that Evan was totally in love with Grayson, and there was no going back on it now. She almost wanted to cry, but Evan Torres was definitely not one for tears, especially not over a boy, even if that boy was the boy that she wanted to be more than just best friends with. “God May-bird, I feel like a confused whore! When he’s around, all I want to do is be with him but the instant he leaves….all I can think about is trying to not be with him! I’ve never felt this way in my life and it’s making things so much more complicated than they need to be in my life.”

All she could do now was hope that May-bird would know the answer to her problem, and that May would keep the secret part of that problem between the two of them.

931 - may-bird/SEREN<3 -evan's going nuts :/ banner made by " miscounted stars , @ caution

[MORGAN MAY BYRD]

sorry you, sorry me, sorry every inbetween

everybody here will never be somebody clean

Peanut butter was the exception to the unspoken rule. The rule that said we like to stay thing. Thin is pretty. Thin felt better, thin felt right. It let her slip into her skin with room to fear. It wasn't a fear of being fat. It was a want to be thin. That's all. That wasn't too unhealthy. It's not like she spent insane moments of time just staring at the wrong parts of her body, marking what should be and what shouldn't be. She simply spent more time as a wolf. There was nothing wrong with that. Somethings just felt right, and some didn't. Being in her toned, fur-covered body was right. Not that anything was wrong with this one. The other was just... right. She felt more comfortable like that. And there was nothing wrong with it.

May meant to laugh, but it came out in a pretty unattractive sort of snort. Not that she cared. She was always doing little quirky things like that. She had never been embarrassed about anything in her life, even the big stuff. She had this face that said fuck off. If wouldn't even think about making fun of her, for anything. She was too sure, she was too untouchable. But, anyway, she laugh-snorted and said " A jet plane could see how close you are. " Cheesy, maybe. But she thought it was an alright answer.

She listened patiently to Evan, and played gently with her fingers. " That's silly to say, the reserved in books things. " For what she was saying, it sounded like she had missed the point. But she was getting there, slowly but surely. " Your life is a story. My life is a story. And, pardon the shitty metaphor, but you're the author. It's your choice on how you write it. Don't sell yourself short, Ev. Don't say you can't have something because it only happens this way, or that way. Don't sell yourself short. " It was May's sensai-way of saying go for it. There was nothing wrong with this. She could see it easily. It seemed to fit everyone's plans. (Some small part of May's mind nagged at her... just what was her plan then?)

She listened to her. “God May-bird, I feel like a confused whore! When he’s around, all I want to do is be with him but the instant he leaves….all I can think about is trying to not be with him! I’ve never felt this way in my life and it’s making things so much more complicated than they need to be in my life.” " May. " She placed a heand on her thigh to make her shut it. " Just stay with him then. It makes the problem a moot point. "