* / i've got a secret --

[EVAN REESE TORRES]

* EVAN REESE TORRES --
PLEASE DON'T REPEAT IT.

please don't think that i'm about to be all cheesy and gushy just because my mom sent me this journal for my birthday. i hadn't gotten around to writing in it until now, but for anyone that's reading this, AND NO ONE SHOULD BE READING THIS IF THEY KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR THEIR FUTURE CHILDREN, i want you to know that being gushy and icky isn't my thing. i don't write about stuff girls usually write about. but then again, i don't really do many things that normal girls usually do. so that's my pre-warning. and here's the story for the day:

i want to go home. that's it. that's my secret for the day. i don't want to be here, cooped up in this camp with imaginary walls around me just because people outside don't know what to make of us. sure, there are evil supernaturals, but not all of us are that way. there will always be a force of evil to go against the force of good. I want to go home knowing that I'm a good person, that I won't cause mass destruction. I want to go home knowing my dad won't think less of me because I shift, or that my brother won't try to show me off his friends. Of course, I wouldn't mind that as much as some other things, but I'm not for show-and-tell without a price.

anyway, i have some things to go do. i might write later, but if i don't i'll eventually get around to it.

* EVAN --

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[EVAN REESE TORRES]

* EVAN REESE TORRES --
PLEASE DON'T REPEAT IT.

i fuckin' opened my big old mouth. i told someone. it told may-bird something that i haven't even written down here! great. she knows. i mean, i can trust her. right? she's one of my best friends here, one of my best friends ever. besides cindy, ash, benji, grayson, and paris she's like my family. right? i consider may the sister i never fucking got so i can trust her with this, right? god, i hope so.

* EVAN --

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[EVAN REESE TORRES]

* EVAN REESE TORRES --
PLEASE DON'T REPEAT IT.

so nothing too monumental happened today. may-bird kept her promise, which i'm so grateful for. oddball twix woke me up by licking my toes, which she knows tickles me like nothing else, on this planet. i swear, as much as i love that cat, she's out to get me. i think it's ash's fault since he got me the kitty! anyway, i love her and i love ash so i'll be a good girl and a good kitty owner.

i miss my little brother. when don't i? mark was like. my best friend in new york, and though i have people like grayson, ash, and may-bird, that doesn't make me miss my own little brother any less. but he's one of those regular humans somehow, and i'm not. i guess it's because my mom's family wasn't all shifter. all of her shifter genes were coded into my dna, but not mark's. which made me a full shifter while mark was just a little human; he gets to live in new york without worrying about riots outside of his door just because he can turn into a fucking bird. the only reason people are so mad is because they're jealous really; but mark never was. he liked that he was human and that i wasn't; it was like he knew i liked being different and he liked it for me too.

well. i have to go. i need to find something...someone to get all of this shit off of my mind, especially since i also have all of the stuff with grayson going around my head too. i don't know if i'm stable enough to tell anyone besides may-bird, which means piling every one of my feelings on top of each other which will probably just end up in a hissy fit induced by a huge fit of rage.

* EVAN --

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